How to get over a person you love
|Name: Jocelyn||My age:||I am 34|
When a relationship ends, the pain can shut you down and make you unproductive. It is harder since you know that there is no mechanical way to fall out of love with someone or eradicate them from your memory. So, what do you do to get over someone that once made your heartbeat so fast? How do you forget the joy that bubbled in your heart every time your favorite song comes on? Getting this closure makes it easier to take the steps that will be mentioned later on how to get over the one that you deeply love.
Most often, they are attributed to memories. Many other factors contribute to the reason why you are still holding on. So let us build different scenarios and find the category into which you fall into.
Could you possibly be holding on to them because you just cannot fathom the fact that they cheated on you? The questions you ask yourself when a partner cheats may place the blame on your doorsteps and make it hard to move on. What if you were ghosted? You may just have to find out that you are single from a Facebook relationship status update that re-Single.
It becomes even harder if you lose a loved one to the cruel hands of death. Moving on feels like a betrayal to their memories. Falling in love again begins to feel like a luxury you dare not enjoy while they lay in the morbid hands of death. Also, we might add the defense mechanism you may likely put up if you were betrayed or had to move out of an abusive relationship. Reconciling the two characters of the person who you loved to the monster they might have become may be challenging to process.
You may begin to create an excuse for their actions putting the blame on yourself or living in fear, not letting anyone in again. You may also be living in a mirage refusing to let anyone in because you have set a standard with the person you used to love, and no one else can beat that standard. The brain reacts in different ways of losing love, and this means that individual reactions will differ from person to person.
Your brain treats emotional pain the same way it would treat physical pain. A study of young adults, who experienced a recent breakup, showed that in the face of a breakup, the brain produced dopamine.
Dopamine is a neurochemical that als the brain to crave a person or object, which ly caused bliss. If you consider it from the science point of view, your brain will continually send als to your body when it perceives something to be a pain. You will continually experience situational depression as there will be a decrease in the production of serotonin, a neurochemical similar to dopamine. Holding on to a love that no longer exists will affect your sleeping and eating pattern, and you may display psychosomatic symptoms that can affect your overall health.
You may also suffer from high blood pressure.
So how do you start?
When you refuse to let go, you break your heart anew. This emotional stress can induce sudden chest pain, which can be symptoms of broken heart syndromealso known as stress-induced cardiomyopathy. Broken heart syndrome can be misdiagnosed as a heart attack.
Also, you can have breakouts and acne as your body will be going through a lot of stress. Increased breakouts might lead to self-esteem issues. The truth is that your mind has a way of affecting the responses that your body gives. Your social life will also suffer as you will find it difficult to go to the places you used to because of the memories they bring.
This will affect your relationship with the people around you. You might even end up throwing tantrums or being overbearing without knowing. Soon people will begin to walk on eggshells around you, and you might not only lose the love of your life but your friends as well. What about the situation at your place of work? How focused are you? When you keep holding on to love, you may end up making numerous mistakes at work and end up losing your job, which is not something you want to happen. Now that you know the effects that holding on to lost love does to you, we can now proceed to steps you can take to let go of them and move on with your life, dreams, and purpose.
Sometimes you are in a hurry to move on and sometimes that might be very difficult. Instead of being in a hurry to get over someone you once loved so deeply, take some time to process the situation. Of course, love is not a switch. You cannot just stop loving them overnight, so you need how to get over a person you love give yourself time.
Scream if you want to, cry and indulge yourself in chocolate or ice cream. Listen to music; it has a way of healing the mind. You can also take a ride on a bicycle to deal with pent up emotions. Now that you are no longer together, you cannot walk past the park anymore. Instead of running, create new memories there. Buy a dog, take it walking in the park. a yoga team on the park. Just create a new memory on that park instead of hiding.
The blame game is fun; the only problem is that you are the loser in this game.
Do not go on and on about the things you could have changed. Do not let the anger boil over to a point where you are now living in anger, unable to move on. Sadness can envelop your soul and make it difficult to move on as it becomes a sanctuary, and you are scared of feeling happy again. Fear can cripple yourself worth and make you feel undeserving of that love.
Silent that little voice in your ears that amplifies all the negative emotions. You are in charge of your emotions and not the other way around. When a relationship ends, we tend to amplify the good qualities of that person and downplay their wrong sides. Seeing the relation for what it was will give you closure.
What does letting go even mean?
However, see the relationship for what it was. Always remember why the relationship had to end. If it was toxic, do not sugarcoat it. If the person cheated on you, do not blame yourself. Even if you had to end it, always remember the way.
How to let go of someone you love – it’s painful, but you can do it
Do not stay focused on the good side that you forget the toxicity. We all need a shoulder to lean on. It might be the shoulder of a friend, a support group, or a therapist. Just ensure you share your feelings and let it all out. However, you may not be able to talk to someone; maybe you are not confident enough to share your experience, you can write.
Keeping a journal will help you open your heart and write down things you may not want to say to anyone. Writing them will help you get over the feelings that you have kept bottled. Everything about your life gets lost in them. When they are no longer there, it becomes a problem to live on your own.
To move on, you have to invest time into loving yourself. How to get over a person you love is one way to get over the person you love; Find yourself and try out new foods and visit new places. Social media has made stalking easier. You can find yourself always keeping tabs on your Ex on social media.
You want to know how quickly they moved on from you, and social media does not help as everyone appears happy there. If you continue keeping tabs on them makes it hard to move on. You are still attached and do not want to let go.
So, take the bold step, and delete the pictures of them you have on social media, block them on all social media platforms, so you do not have to keep tabs on them. While you do not have to hate them, you can just avoid the notion of keeping tabs on time until you are mentally strong enough to handle seeing them again.